around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
