youre lurking in front of me
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize