38 yer olds are good kisserssss
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Randomize
