sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
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Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
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Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
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