Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
