i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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