Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
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