But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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