Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
