no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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