I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
