im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
