i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
