just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
