You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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