He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
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