so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
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