i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Duck Duck Cougar?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
