Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The beer is more important than you right now.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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