My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize