There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
She announced her abortion via fbk
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
