She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
