We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
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I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
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You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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