We should be called the Road Head Warriors
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
