I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize