What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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