She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
