im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
