Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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