i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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