Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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