at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize