His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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