Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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