im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
