Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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