doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
PANTIES FOUND
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