If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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