the new term for farting is butt boxing.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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