That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize