Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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