I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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