just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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