You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Randomize
