a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
did i just pee glitter
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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