just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
