love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
