Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
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