We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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