Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
