thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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